1. I'M DANCING IN THE SHOW TONIGHT

Are my lemons tied?
Is my hair in place?
Have I got a cute expression on my face?
Are my shoes all shined?
I try to keep in line
When I'm dancing in the show tonight

Does my shuffle step
Really look so good?
Am I doing it the way you think I should?
Would it be amiss
If I blew a kiss
When I'm dancing in the show tonight?

Showtime now is getting nearer
And I'm getting scared
Wish I could see in the mirror
If I'm all prepared

First you take a step
Then you point your toe
Hope I know it like I did a week ago
Am I standing straight?
I can hardly wait
Till I'm dancing in the show tonight

Showtime now is getting nearer
And I'm getting scared
Wish I could see in the mirror
If I'm all prepared

First you take a step
Then you point your toe
Hope I know it like I did a week ago
Am I standing straight?
I can hardly wait
Till I'm dancing in the show tonight


2. THE MOLLUSK

Hey little boy, whatcha got there?
Kind sir it's a mollusk i've found
Did you find it in the sandy ground?
Does it emulate the ocean's sound?
Yes I found it on the ground
Emulating the ocean's sound
Bring forth the mollusk cast unto me
Let's be forever let forever be free

Hey little boy come walk with me
And bring your new found mollusk along
Does it speaketh of the trinity
Can it gaze at the sun with its wandering eye
Yes it speaks of the trinity
Casting light at the sun with its wandering eye
Bring forth the mollusk, cast unto me
Let's be forever let forever be free

You see there are three things that spur the mollusk from the sand
The waking of all creatures that live on the land
And with just one faint glance, back into the sea
The mollusk lingers, with it's wandering eye...


3. POLKA DOT TAIL

Have you ever seen a whale
With a polka dot tail
Have you ever seen a man
With eight fingers on his hand
Did you have to dry your eye
When you saw that puppy fly
Oh no, tell me it aint so...

Have you ever tried to shrink
Like a ice cube in the sink
Have you ever tried to see
What lies hidden in the tree
Have you ever made a flan
And squished it in your hand
Oh no, tell me it aint so...


4. I'LL BE YOUR JOHNNY ON THE SPOT

I'll be your jonny on the spot
I'll be your jonny on the spot
My daddy died, left me all he's got
I'll be your jonny on the spot

I get up early in the morn
I get up early in the morn
I slop the pigs
Momma shucks the corn
I get up early in the morn

I got a chevy with a mopar cam
I got a chevy with a mopar cam
I got a chevy with a-mopar-cam
I'll be your johnny on the spot

(solo)

I'm goin' down...



5. MUTILATED LIPS

I lick my brain in silence
Rather squeeze my head instead
Midget man provoking violence
Listen not to what I said

I said please calm it down
Everything is turning brown

Mutilated lips give a kiss on the wrist
Of the worm like tips of tentacles expanding
In my mind, I'm fine, accepting only fresh brine
You can get another drop of this, yeah you wish...
(REPEAT)

Laughing lady living lover
Ooo you sassy frassy lassie
Find me the skull of Haile Sellase, I...
Give me shoes so I can tapsy
Tap all over this big world
Take my hand you ugly girl....

(Chorus)


6. THE BLARNEY STONE

Get off my ass you wee bitty fuck
If I pull out the claymore you're shit outta luck
Who's that girl, that pretty young thing
After I fuck her she'll get up and sing

Aye Aye Aye
Sharpen your boot, and bludgeon your eye
Aye Aye Aye
The Blarney Stone brings a tear to me eye

Down to the pub for a two shilling ale
The bread on the counter is going stale
If I don't get some fresh bread soon
Gonna punch you in your face and bark at the moon

Aye Aye Aye
Sharpen your boot, and bludgeon your eye
Aye Aye Aye
The Blarney Stone brings a tear to me eye

Aint got no girl 'cuz I haven't the time
Got too many other things on me mind
Patty was nice she was pale and cute
But I threw her away like an old piece of fruit

Aye Aye Aye
Sharpen your boot, and bludgeon your eye
Aye Aye Aye
The Blarney Stone brings a tear to me eye

Got ooze in my pores my feet are all wet
Got mold in my ears but I ain't dead yet
Got stones in me bladder got a crack in me head
When Patty starts cryin' this is what I said

Aye Aye Aye
Sharpen your boot, and bludgeon your eye
Aye Aye Aye
The Blarney Stone brings a tear to me eye


7. IT'S GONNA BE (ALRIGHT)

Baby what have I done
Gone and left you, all alone
Its hard for me to sing this song
We've been together for so long

I think I know what my soul's got to say
And it wont hurt as bad, someday

Its gonna be alright, baby
Its gonna be alright, love
And if the mist ever lets the sun through
I'll just hope I did the right thing
For me and you

Guess I'm ruled by my heart
Built a life and I tore it all apart
It's just not our time
But you'll find a new love, and you'll be fine

So many dark and lonely nights
But I believe someday i'll see the light

It's gonna be alright, baby
Its gonna be alright , love
And if the mist ever lets the sun through
I'll just hope I did the right thing
For me and you


8. THE GOLDEN EEL

Sitting alone in the den
Watching the eel
Help me find my way home watching the eel
Burrows it's head in the sand
Daylight has come
There shall be rest in a while
Daylight has come

I can not repeal
The words of the golden eel

Who can explain all these thoughts racking my mind
An endless barrage of shit racking my mind
The eel offered his help I can't understand
Speaking it's truth from the bank
Now I can see

I can not repeal the words of the golden eel
I can not repeal the words of the golden eel
(solo)

I can not reveal the words of the golden eel


9. COLD BLOWS THE WIND

Cold blows the wind over my true love
Cold blows the drops of rain
I never had but one true love
And in Camville he was slain

I'll do as much for my true love
As any young girl may
I'll sit and weep down by his grave
For twelve month and one day

But when twelve months were come and gone
This young man he arose
What makes you weep down by my grave
I can't take my repose

One kiss, one kiss of your lily white lips
One kiss is all I crave
One kiss, one kiss of your lily white lips
And return back to your grave

My lips they are as cold as my clay
My breath is heavy and strong
If thou was to kiss my lily white lips
Thy days would not be long

Oh don't you remember the garden grove
Where we used to walk
Pluck the finest flower of them all
Twill wither to a stalk

Go fetch me a Nun from the dungeon deep
And water from a stone
And white milk from a maiden's breast
That babe ere never known

Go dig me a grave both long, wide and deep
As quickly as you may
I'll lie down in it and take one sleep
For twelve month and one day

Cold blows the wind over my true love
Cold blows the drops of rain
I never had but one true love
And in camville he was slain

I'll do as much for my true love
As any young girl may
I'll sit and weep down by his grave
For twelve month and one day


10. PINK EYE (ON MY LEG)

(Instrumental)



11. WAVING MY DICK IN THE WIND

I'm waving my dick in the wind
Waving my dick in the wind
If it all goes right, i'll be in your arms tonight
But I'm wavin' my dick in the wind

I'm lost in the sauce once again
I'm lost in the sauce once again
If I make it through the night
Everything will be alright
But I'm lost in the sauce once again

Its been 97 days since i've laid my head beside you
And a million miles of highway in between
There's some red and blue lights that are shinin' right behind me
And that pig's a pretty mean bastard

You should have seen old Jimmy Wilson dance
You should have seen old Jimmy Wilson dance
Give that boy a dime and you could have a chance
To see old Jimmy Wilson dance
Dance Jimmy...

I've got a real good feelin bout' old Jimmy Wilson
Sho' nuff' he's got what it takes
Do another number for me please won't ya Jimmy
Cause you're a really good dancer...

Im wavin my dick in the wind....


12. BUCKINGHAM GREEN

A child without an eye
Made her mother cry
Why ask why
She kept her child clean
On Buckingham Green

The children saw the eye
As a sign from God
Descending from the sky
It was alright to dream
Of Buckingham Green

Summon the queen
Spoke the child of eye
It's time to fly
Turning fire to steam
On Buckingham Green


13. OCEAN MAN

Ocean man, take me by the hand, lead me to the land
That you understand
Ocean man, the voyage to the corner of the globe
Is a real trip
Ocean man, the sequence of a life form braised in the sand,
Soaking up the thirst of the land

Ocean man, can you see through the wonder of amazement
At the oberman
Ocean man, the crust is elusive when it casts forth
To the childlike man
Ocean man, the crust of a tan man embibed by the sand
Soaking up the thirst of the land

Ocean man...


14. SHE WANTED TO LEAVE (REPRISE)

Three men's all there were
Three men out at sea
Three men came aboard my ship
And took my true love from me
I couldn't believe
She wanted to leave
She wanted to leave

I've loved you so long
Since you were a child
I've cared for your every need
I've tried to make you smile
When all the while
You wanted to leave
You wanted to leave

Go gather the guns
We'll blast them at sea
She begged for me not to shoot
For "my true love is here with me,
And i've never loved thee,
And now I must leave,
And now I must leave."

So go fetch a bottle of rum dear friends
And fill up my glass to the rim
For I'm not the man, I used to be
Now I'm one of them