1. PROPAGANDA

"Hello soldier boy," oh boy, she's spewing out her
propaganda, propaganda
Might makes right, though you are wrong,
you're right to fight her
propaganda, propaganda, propaganda

"Come to our side," she does say
"Come on over," she does say
Well I don't need more
Competition for
Her affection
You should fight on
Fight on
Over there


2. AT HOME, AT WORK, AT PLAY

At home, at work, at play
I know you're unavailable from dusk to dawn
Or if you were available you'd bring along
A lot of what could only be a hindrance to me
I ain't a glutton for a lot of sweaty company

You gotta catch her while she's still at home
You gotta catch her while she's still at work
You gotta catch her while she's still at play
The only way is at home, work, or play

Time really flies when it ain't that much time
You better shave half your face at a time
And brush the front of your teeth, leave the rest
And be with her when she's not with the rest
Stop, there's gotta be a million girls like her, though
I can't think of one
So you catch her while she's still at home
And you catch her while she's still at work
And you catch her while she's still at play

Don't let her calendar be any cause to pout
There is a bit of time when there are few about
I'm gonna skirt the issue of her popularity
And just avail myself of all the time that she is free

You gotta catch her while she's still at home
You gotta catch her while she's still at work
You gotta catch her while she's still at play
Cause half the day she's at home, work or play

And time is fleeing the scene of the crime
The act of passing out wrinkles and lines
To every person regardless of race
To every person regardless of face
Stop, there's gotta be a million girls like her though
I can't think of one
So at home she says you butler well
And at work she says you're typing well
And at play she says you caddie well

Stop, There's gotta be a million girls like her though
I can't think of one

So you catch her while she's still at home
And you catch her while she's still at work
And you catch her while she's still at play

I'm gonna love you under incandescent light
I'm gonna love you under fluorescent light
The glaring sun above should not inhibit us at all
I'm very glad to know that your libido never palls

Stop, she's unique, especially at home
Where you're butler, maid, and often cook
And at work together juggling books

Or at play between the tennis sets
Or at play before she's placed her bet
Or at play while she's still slightly wet
Or at play while she is dripping wet


3. REINFORCEMENTS

I'm on guard again but unprepared to fend for myself in a battle
You wont tell me why the shrubbery moves
Or why there always has to be subterfusion
You wont even say "at ease"
After waging a costly siege
When a potentate ain't so potent in his state he summons help fast
Unilaterally I withdraw
What was peace is now a grand coup d'etat
The Purple Heart for valour please
And no heart for you Denise

Reinforcements, reinforcements
I could use a strong rear guard
Reinforcements, reinforcements
First the left flank, then the right
I'd sooner work the PX tonight

Spoken: You intercept my S.O.S in order that no
news of my distress will ever reach the
homefront and about my camouflage,
well, it didn't work on you ... in fact most
things they tell recruits never seem to do

Raise my rank if I should last another night so tortuous
Reinforcements, reinforcements
I don't want a tete-a-tete
Reinforcements, reinforcements
Let's reach accord, and ink a pact
Then, please dismiss your regiment


4. B.C.

My name's Aaron
Hers is Betty
Our boy is a Charlie, so the neighbours sing "hooray for ABC"
ABC forever, each endeavour that I do, I do to keep together
A+B+C

BC, Betty, Betty, get back here
BC, Charlie, Charlie, get back here
You're conveniently forgetting our little wedding
So much for our ABC
Say hello to instability

Everyone we know is shifting to, is shifting fro, with
the exception of we 3, we're ABC
Aaron, Betty, Charlie, here today and here
tomorrow, I can hear them sing "Here, here" for ABC

BC, Betty, Betty, get back here
BC, Charlie, Charlie, get back here
Three was never crowded, our little house did house three handsomely
BC, Betty, Betty, get back here
BC, Charlie, Charlie, get back here
You're conveniently forgetting our little wedding, our honeymoon beside the sea

You just cannot believe in ABC
If you can't believe in ABC, you can't believe,
You can't believe, you can't believe, you can't believe
Rumours spread like tumours, too too fast and too too true

Oh, Betty, Charlie, Betty, Charlie don't you leave
BC, that takes care of ABC
BC, that takes care of ABC
Once the fixture of the ages, the Yellow Pages start
with baby's needs

BC, back to swinging in the trees
BC, back to crawling on my knees
Aaron's here without a Betty
without a Charlie
So much for our ABC
So much for our stability
So much for our stability
So much for our A+B+C


5. THANKS BUT NO THANKS

Just keep right on walking
Just keep right on walking

Don't dilly-dally, come right home
I don't see why I must go home
When in the streets the niceties
Come pouring out and over me
Its three o'clock and here they come
So many that my eyes are numb
Familiar faces each and all
But I've been ordered not to stall

Thanks but no thanks, anyway
I know that you're all OK, but
My orders come from high above me
About a foot or two above me

The merry band of "How are you's"

In tweedy suits and pointy shoes
They offer me a ride in style
And something sweet to make me smile
I hate to hurt their feelings so
But I'm supposed to tell them no
My parents say the world is cruel
I think that they prefer it cruel

Thanks but no thanks, anyway
I know that you're all OK, but
My orders come from high above me
About a foot or two above me
Just keep right on walking
Just keep right on walking
Just keep right on walking
Just keep right on walking

Thanks but no thanks, anyway
I know that you're all OK, but
My orders come from high above me
About a foot or two above me
Thanks but no thanks anyway
Thanks but no thanks anyway
Thanks but no thanks anyway, anyway, anyway


6. DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE WITH HER

The Exodus is on
The impetus is gone
Nobody's having fun
How about another drink
Or maybe just a snack
The rest will be here soon
Here, let me take your mac
I know its started slow
There's still no need to go

Chorus
Don't leave me alone with her
Every home is Rome alone with her
And if you all go, who'll say no to her
Don't leave me alone with her
Don't my sweat and shaking register
Cause if you all go, who'll say no to her

You look at her and say, "She looks OK to me"
I look at her and say, "She looks OK to me"
The reason's very clear
You're watching her with me

Don't leave me alone with her
Every home is Rome alone with her
And if you all go, who'll say no to her

Unwitting chaperons, how come you cannot see
Unwitting chaperons, how come you cannot see
A Hitler wearing heels
A soft Simon Legree
A Hun with honey skin
De Sade who makes good tea
Don't leave me here to be
Don't leave me here to be?

Chorus
Don't leave me alone with her, etc.


7. NEVER TURN YOUR BACK ON MOTHER EARTH

When she's on her best behaviour
Don't be tempted by her favours

Never turn your back on mother earth

Towns are hurled from A to B
By hands that looked so smooth to me

Never turn your back on mother earth

Grasp at straws that don't want grasping
Gaze at clouds that come down crashing

Never turn your back on mother earth

Three days and two nights away from my friends
Amen to anything that brings a quick return to my friends
To my friends

Never turn your back on mother earth

I'll admit I was unfaithful
But from now I'll be more faithful

Never turn your back on mother
Never turn your back on mother
Never turn your back on mother
Never turn your back on mother
Never t urn your back on mother earth


8. SOMETHING FOR THE GIRL WITH EVERYTHING

See, the writing's on the wall
You bought the girl a wall
Complete with matching ball-point pen
You can breathe another day
Secure in knowing she won't break you (yet)

Something for the girl with everything
Have another sweet my dear
Don't try to talk my dear
Your tiny little mouth is full
Here's a flavour you ain't tried
You shouldn't try to talk, your mouth is full

Something for the girl with everything
Three wise men are here
Three wise men are here
Bearing gifts to aid amnesia
She knows everything
She knows everything
She knew you way back when you weren't yourself

Here's a really pretty car
I hope it takes you far
I hope it takes you fast and far
Wow, the engine's really loud
Nobody's gonna hear a thing you say

Something for the girl with everything
Three wise men are here
Three wise men are here
Where should they leave these imported gimmicks
Leave them anywhere
Anywhere
Make sure that there's a clear path to the door

Something for the girl with everything
Something for the girl with everything
Something for the girl with everything
Something for the girl with everything
Three wise men are here
Three wise men are here
Three wise men are here
Three wise men are here

Here's a partridge in a tree,
A gardener for the tree
Complete with ornithologist
Careful, careful with that crate
You wouldn't want to dent Sinatra, no

Something for the girl who has got everything,
Yes everything
Hey, come out and say hello
Before our friends all go
But say no more than just hello
Ah, the little girl is shy
You see of late she's been quite speechless, very speechless
She's got everything


9. ACHOO

Who knows what the winds gonna bring when the invalids sing
"La la's" with a powerful sting that'll stop any opera or any Bing
Sing, spread the news across the land
All winners will be also-rans

Achoo - one size fits everyone
Achoo - one breath, the deed has been done

Grey hair and a dash and a flair give your doctor an air
I'm hurt, but the choice that you made is an obvious one
for a girl who needs care
I do hope that he makes you well
Say, is there any cure for Hell,

Achoo - one size fits everyone
Achoo - one breath, the deed has been done

Sing, Ile de France and everywhere
You can't ignore that sort of air

Achoo - one size fits everyone
Achoo - one breath, the deed has been done

So, open wide, open wide and say, open wide and say goodbye, you'll be OK

Achoo - he's gonna whisk you away
Achoo - he's gonna make you OK
(repeat x 4)


10. WHO DON'T LIKE KIDS

You got a cigar, here's a couple more because the offspring
Are springing through swinging doors into a world
of "Ain't he cute, he looks a lot like his father" and

Here comes another
Of that proof that I'm not just a vegetable, the little
Proof that I'm more than a mineral, the little
Proof that I'm just like the next guy, whoever he may be

Who don't like kids, who don't like kids

Crawl, walk, running around
Living proof that I'm really sound
They'll ensure I'm always around

And your bit and my bit'll do their dance to body rumblings
And tumblings and rote romance and all the while
I'm thinking, deeply thinking, hey what's it gonna be
Sod or celebrity

(Boy or girl)
(Boy or girl)
Oh well its off to work
And so long baby, kiss 'em goodbye for me

Who don't like kids, who don't like kids

Crawl, walk, running around
Living proof that I'm really sound
They'll ensure I'm always around
There's more in the wings shall we bring them on or
Shall we just sit and talk 'til the early morning and
Recite sweet nothings (sweet, sweet nothings)
In everybody's ear

Who don't like kids, etc.


11. BON VOYAGE

Bon voyage, bon voyage, bon voyage
Bon voyage, bon voyage, bon voyage

Clouds forming on the gospel sky, trouble is about to brew on us
It didn't matter that we tried, they can only take a few of us
The fins and the paws and hooves and feet

Saunter up the gangway
The randomest sampling is complete
God, could there be some way
That I could
wear a hood
or by the
way I stood
Sneak aboard with you
Imitate,
Imitate,
Imitate,
Imitate,
they still know its you

Bon voyage, bon voyage, bon voyage, peace be with all of you
I wish that I, I wish that I, were one of you

Tears falling on the sloping sand, they're about to leave and we will stay
All governed by the rules of chance, they're about to leave and we will stay
Goodbye to my lucky friends and foes, glad that we could know you
Everyone sends their last hello, I wish that we could join you
Two of you
Two of them
Two of those
Two of them
Safety for the few
Two of you
Two of them
Two of those
Two of them
They will start anew

Bon voyage, bon voyage, bon voyage peace be with all of you
I wish that I, I wish that I, I wish that I?

Bickering,
Dickering,
Bickering,
Dickering,
Everything that moves
Bickering,
Dickering,
Bickering,
Dickering,
Final, futile moves
Bon voyage, bon voyage, bon voyage, peace be with all of you
I wish that I, I wish that I, I wish that I?


12. ALABAMY RIGHT

Squeeze in between the lines
Hustle it's nearly five, hustle it's nearly five
They're coming with coupons they're coming with kids
A hungry army soon will need to be fed And they'll Alabamy right around the register It sure looks good to me Alabamy milk and honey ev'rywhere

They're scaling the mountains of frozen delights There's been an avalanche on aisle number nine And they'll Alabamy right around the register It sure looks good to me No need to go miles to Hollywood or pretend that you're celestial
There's no waiting now on checkstand number eighteen

Squeeze in between the lines Hustle it's nearly five, hustle it's nearly five

The place plays no favorites by day or by night It will not be offended if you buy light Just so you Alabamy right around the register It sure looks good to me Alabamy milk and honey ev'rywhere It sure looks good to me It sure looks good to me
It sure looks good to me It sure looks good to me It sure looks good to me


13. MARRY ME

Someone to bring me out Someone to let me in Someone, someone...
And all the eager-beaver men come watch away their blues They place themselves in place of me and face to face with you
And each pretend, you're loving him but that's not very true Cause you're not acting, nor am I though I could use some proof

Chorus
Marry me, marry me, what's the story Though a thousand hungry people try to crash our story
But no one in that darkened world
Need ever know but I know
Marry me

A happily-ever-after does that seem to much to ask?
With trees and tots and stucco walls and fountains in the back
And lawns that you or I can mow and neighbours who will chat About important issues and the state of this 'n that

Chorus
Marry me, marry me, what's the story Though a thousand hungry people try to crash our story
But no one in that darkened world Need ever know but I know Marry me

Someone to bring me out Someone to let me in Someone to bring me joy Somebody near me
Somebody near me Somebody nearly me
The purple mountains majesty above the fruited plain
Is peeling off the wall of Lucky's Miramar Motel

Marry me, marry me, what's the story Though a thousand hungry people try to crash our story
But no one in that darkened world
Need ever know but I know Marry me ..

Someone to bring me out Someone to let me in Someone to bring me joy Somebody near me Somebody near me Somebody nearly me

Chorus
Marry me, marry me, what's the story Though a thousand hungry people try to crash our story