1. SHADRACH

Riddle me this brother can you handle it
Your style to my style you can't hold a candle to it
Equinox symmetry and the balance is right
Smokin' and drinkin' on a Tuesday night
It's not how you play the game it's how you win it
I cheat and steal and sin and I'm a cynic
For those about to rock we salute you
The dirty thoughts for dirty minds we contribute to

I once was lost but now I'm found
The music washes over and you're one with the sound
Who shall inherit the earth the meek shall
I think I'm starting to peak now Al
From S.S. Decontrol and the man upstairs I hope that he cares
If I had a penny for my thoughts I'd be a millionaire
We're just three M.C.'s and we're on the go
Sharach...Mesach...Abednago (Sharach...Mesach...Abednago)

Only twenty four hours in a day
Only twelve notes a man can play
Music for all and not just one people
And now we're gonna bust with the Putney Swope sequel
More Adidas sneakers that a plumber got pliers
Got more suites that Jacoby & Meyers
If not for my vices my bugged out desires
My year would be good just like Goodyear's tires
So I'm out pickin' pockets at the Atlantic Antic
And nobody wants to hear you cause your rhymes are so frantic
I mix business with pleasure way too much
I mean wine and women and song and such
I don't get blue I gotta mean red streak
You don't pay the band your friends and that's weak
Get even like Steven like pulling a Rambo
Sharach...Mesach...Abednago (Sharach...Mesach...Abednago)

Steal from the rich and I'm out robbing banks
Give to the poor and I always give thanks
Got more stories that J.D. Salinger
I hold the title and you are the challenger
I've got money like Charles Dickens
Got the girlies in the Couple like the Colonel's got the chickens
Always go out dapper like Harry S. Truman
I'm madder than Mad's Alfred E. Newman
(Never gonna let them say that I don't love you)
My noggin is hoggin' all kinds of thoughts
Adam Yoggin is Yauch and he's rockin' of course
Smoke the holy chalice got my own religion
Rally round the stage and check the funky dope musicians
Jerry Lee Swaggert or Jerry Lee Falwell
You love Mario Andretti cause he always drives his car well

Vicious circle of reality since the day you were born
And we love the hot butter on what the popcorn
Sippin on wine and mackin'
Rockin on the stage with all the hands clappin'
Ride the wave of fate it don't ride me
(Being very proud to be an M.C.)
And the man upstairs I hope that he cares If I had a penny for my
Thoughts I'd be a millionaire
Amps and crossovers under my rear hood
The bass is bumpin' from the back of my Fleetwood Brougham D'Elegance
They tell us what to do hell no
Sharach...Mesach...Abednago (Sharach...Mesach...Abednago)


2. CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF A 3-WAY MIX

"Stop that train I wanna' get off"

Well..
It's 4:00 a.m. I've got the Dr. Hfuhruhurr Ale
I've got nothing to lose so I'm pissin' on the third rail
Groggy eyed and fried I'm headed for the station
D-Train ride Coney Island vacation
Dedicated to the boofers in the back of the 1 train
They'll be kickin' out windows high on cocaine
And then I jump the turnstyle I lost my last token
Riding between the cars pissin' smokin'
Head for the last car fluorescent light blackout
Policeman told my homeboy yo put that crack out
You know you light up when the lights go down
And then you read the New York Post Fulton St. downtown
Same faces every day but you don't know their names
Party people going placed on the D-Train

"Stop that train I wanna' get off"
"Stop that train I wanna' get off"

Check it..
Trench coat wing tip going to work
And you be pulling a train like Captain Kirk
Pick pocket gangsters paying their debts
I caught a bullet in the lung from Bernie Goetz
Overworked and underpaid staring at the floor
Prostitutes spandex caught in the slide doors
Now you're stuck between the stations and it seems like an eternity
Sweating like sardines in a flophouse fraternity
A $50.00 fine for disturbing the peace
The neck tortoise the Lees I creased
Hot cup of coffee and the donuts are Dunkin'
Friday night and Jamaica Queens funkin'
Elevated platform I'm never gonna' conform
Riding over the diner where I always get my toast warm
Bust into the conductor's booth and busted out rhymes
Over the loud speaker about the hard times
Sat across from a man readin' El Diario
Riding the train down from the El Barrio
Went from the station to Orange Julius
I Bought a hot dog from who George Drakoulias


3. AND WHAT YOU GIVE IS WHAT YOU GET

Call the people, are you ready now
Shadrach Mesach Abednago
Shadrach Mesach Abednago
Shadrach Mesach Abednago
Shadrach..

Money money money..
Mine uptone, the DJ up there..
Shadrach Mesach Abednago
Shadrach Mesach Abednago
Shadrach Mesach Abednago
Shadrach.. Hey, hey hey..

Shadrach Mesach Abednago
Shadrach Mesach Abednago
Here's something fresh
Oh, that was nice
Let me be your barber now

Shadrach Mesach Abednago
Shadrach Mesach Abednago
Shadrach Mesach Abednago
Shadrach.. Hey, hey hey..

Come on lets get down
You ready
God damn bitch
What was that that you put on me
Never gonna' let em say that I don't love you
Now let me hear my man now Mike
Mike can do it, Mike you can do
Mike can do it, Mike you can do
Mike can do it, Mike you can do
Do it..
Say what" for popcorn
Hey you very proud to be an MC
I can do it, you can do it
They can do it, we can do it
Hey man this is 75, that rope shit is dead
I can do it, you can do it
They can do it, we can do it
I can do it, you can do it
They can do it, we can do it
I can do it, you can do it
They can do it, we can do it
I can do it, you can do it
They can do it, we can do it
And what you give is what you get


4. CAR THIEF

Some static started in the pool hall
In a motherfucker's face with the cue ball
Then I met this girl she tried to gank me
So I smacked her in the pocket with M.C. Plank Bee
Me and my crew out breaking windows
The bingo the lotto you know I'll never win those
Possession is half the law
I had my routines before all y'all
Your whole life is coming apart at the seams
You ain't nothing but a car thief biting routines
I'm a city slicker I ain't no townie
Right now I wish I had another hash brownie
Like Ricky always said you've got to toke and pass
Or Mookie's gonna kick your fuckin' ass
You try to take what isn't yours like a God damn rat
See personally I wouldn't want to go out like that
I'm a writer a poet a genius I know it
I don't buy cheeba I grow it
I'm a farmer people always trying to get next to me
But I'm down with Jalil Donkey and Ecstasy
Smoked up a bag of elephant tranquilizer
Because I had to deal with a money hungry miser
Had a caine filled cool with my man Rush Rush
Saw my teeth fall in the sink when I started to brush
You be doing nose candy on the Bowie coke mirror
My girl asked for some but I pretended not to hear her
You can't deny me you always want to try me
You're just gonna get your ass kicked
Homeboy throw in the towel
Your girl got dicked by Ricky Powell
The Godfather of Soul is in the belly of the beast
For smoking that dust at St. Anthony's Feast
Sometimes you've got to let someone trip on their own
Shoelace before you tell them to tie their shoe
All the wife beaters and all the tax cheaters
Sitting in the White House pulling their peters
Buy me cheeba from the cop down the street
The only cop with a rope chain walking the beat
Like a sneaky pouch time bomb tickin'
Like the beat to my rhyme just kickin'
Space cake cookies I discover who I am
I'm a dusted old bummy 'Hurdy Gurdy Man'
Five-O caught me now I'm going to the mountains
Said good-bye to my girl my lawyers and accountants
My mind is kinda rhymin and I think I oughta think
So I'm rockin all the rhymes and I'll have another drink
So the lights are flashing my mind is spinning
I feel like it is always the beginning
Of another rhyme I'm rapping M.C.'ing I rock
You ain't nothing but a car thief who must be stopped


5. SOME DUMB COP GAVE ME TWO TICKETS ALREADY

Ummmm.... yea baby
Don't you know it like, don't it feel good
Like you know it should
In '89, right on time
Always so quick with the rhymes
Aghhh..

Girl you know it's true
You know you know it's true
Mike D. is in love with you
In love with you
In love with you, oh baby
Girl you know it's true
Whooo, awwghoo..
Mike D. is in love with you

Aghhhhoooo..
Yea baby you know
Listen
Everybody knows that I broke your heart you know
Everybody knows Mike D. broke your heart
But you gots to stop tell them how I stole your car
You know just ain't fair
Hey, you know
Just as I got the, the better side of the bargain just means
That the cars were built to my favor you know

Girl you know it's true
Mike D. is in love with you

Yea, I remember the first time I saw you
And you were standin there lookin all lovely and everything
I went over, you know
And I started smellin your ass
And then Ricky Powell came over
You know, started doin the A.T.D. and everyting
Agh... Yeah baby...

Girl you know it's true
Mike D. is in love with you
Is in love with you baby, whooo, in love with you
Girl you know it's true
Mike D. is in love with you
Oh it's true it's true it's true baby..
Girl you know it's true
True-a true-a true-a true-a true-a baby auhnn..
Mike D. is in love with you
Ouhhh..
Girl you know it's true
It's so true now baby..
Oghhh... it's true it's true it's true
Mike D. is in love with you
I love you... aghooo...
Girl you know it's true

You know alot of MC's these days
They make records about, you know
Women taken over the money
Hey, you know I'm straight up honest
I just be leachin off my girl, you know
Just leachin off my bitch, that's what it's about
You know, hey..
If you can get a roof over your head
And a pot to piss in, man
Shit, that's better then havin' money in the pocket
You know..
Agh yea..
Agh Mike D. Mike D. Mike D. Mike D. Mike D...

I'd like to welcome everybody to the
Quiet Mike D. swarm
Starrin' Mike D.
Featuring Mike D.
And, agh, special appearance by Mike D.
Da Da-da-daa-da daa-da-da-da-daa
Ohhh, oh baby you

Girl you know it's true
Incredible
Mike D. is in love with you
Invinceable
Most incredible
Unstopable, Achnicolus
Liz Clayborn, Coochie,Your mother
Girl you know it's true
That's right, baby
When you weren't lookin'
When you went out shoppin that day
Your mother came over
She was lookin' kinda nice, you know
Uhh, you wouldn't believe what she was wearing under that dress, you know
Anyway... so
You know, one thing lead to another
You know, i'm real sorry you had to walk in like that and see
Hey, shit happens you know
Mike D. is in love with you

Aaghh yeah...
Mm do do doon
Do do do do doon
Aaah do doon
Do de di de du doon
Da do do doon
Daa doon..
Girl you know it's true
That's right baby..


6. YOUR SISTER'S DEF

Brothers out there with sisters, peep it
Years and years you try to keep her a secret
Said she's your cousin that came for a visit
Your puttin' me on, is this true, now who is it
Called your crib, got a clickin dial tone
You said it was the maid that hung up the phone
Caught her on the streets, so we took the risk
Guess what, we found out she was your sis
Now we're not Tom, Dick, Harry, or Roy
Let us crack the freak, because we're your boys
Tonight we're dropin by cause your parents left
The Beastie Boy gonna' let you know

Your sister's def
Your sister's def

She's so hook, is she, how can it be
Don't lie, she's not in your family
Cause if you didn't know, people spread the word
Your a square sucker whipped, yes your a nerd
To be down, there's one thing you'll discover
Your sister must be a plash Beastie lover
So don't get sick, she was our pick
I hope her tongue is long, we like to be licked
You'll see it's not hard, it's naughty nice
You gotta pay us dues, and she's the price
Don't start to think about the worlds discuss
Your sisters gotta hang, and that's a must
It's plain and simple, it ain't no thing
She's real def, let us give her a ring
So we conclude, this is your best move
Welcome, the Beastie Boys approve
Your sister's def

This week we all will meet
Right now the party season will reach its peek
Juice all around town, we're on the guest lists
We'll bring three tricks, you bring your sis
Pay attention real close, we just begun
Trick number one is to grab her buns
We'll loose control, but we'll keep it clean
She better not wear a dress, wear the blue jeans
New or faded, we want 'em tight
Take the pockets off so we can grip it right
Stand in front, we wanna see what we like
If the room's too dark, you bring a flashlight
Two is do the do, for the whole crew
A dead give away cause we're givin her clues
She better be ready to play the wall
Cause it's all for one, and one for all
No matter who's first, lets start the show
There are no rules, go for what you know
We won't slack up, won't let her rest
Our pride is on the line, to see who's best
Now that you've heard thoughts quite absurd
Convince your sis, put in a good word
Your sister's def

At last a neurotic feast
We're slaying your sister like a horny beast
So don't get mad, don't be upset
It's now her time to be a Beastie pet
As you can see most definitely
Is trick number three, pure fantasy
Now we're your friend, and your her brother
But your sisters so def we might scheme on your mother
We can't ignore now that we saw
She's def so we wanna be your in-law
We're havin fun, yo we ain't done
The Beastie Boys has just begun

Because your sister's def
Your sister's def

Took a walk around the crack of dawn
I noticed her bedroom light was on
Her shadow moved over as the lights went lower
I crept to the window to see a little closer
Said to myself, I got it made
The window was open, so was the shade
Came in real neat, she was in heat
Your sister gave a class A peach-o treat
Her clothes got thinner, I showed her my winner
Beastie beef is now served for dinner
Your sister's def

Later on I came around the way
But sis MCA said he got some play
There had to be a reason for the news I learned
Time to get on it cause it's Mike D.'s turn
Nobody was home, I didn't see the car
She took me downstairs and we crashed the bar
We was chillin in the basement, drinkin' Red Wipple
After a while my head between pink nipples
Grabbin at your sis cause I can't resist
I start to dive, pummel her rumble fish
When I got through, next thing she knew
On her thighs was a beastie tattoo
Your sister's def

That's it, AdRock is pissed
If you leave me in the room with your sister, I'm takin her clit
You can bet if she gets wet
The King AdRock will make her sweat
I throw her down, then take her underwear
Then search 'em so I can eat the pubic hairs
Even in her dream scene, she starts to scream
It's the AdRock inches, and you know what I mean
We had her in the week, your sisters cheap
The Beastie Boys just made a clean sweep
Your sister's def